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Last week was a stressful one for me, saddled with headaches and stomach upset. I didn’t have the time or strength to write something or lookout for an old write-up for the blog. So I was not just happy when I received his word document, I was relieved! You know what they say about spending so much time with someone. You end up falling in love with them, behaving and even thinking like they do…today I add a new one, you also find interest in their extracurricular activities and making them yours as well. So today I share a write up from my best friend. Please cut him some slack, he’s not a writer, he is just exploring his interest in what I do. As you read his post, remember you also owe me one write up..lol

He Writes…

So it was a Sunday morning and I had really made up my mind to leave home a bit late to church than I normally do. I was getting ready at a slow pace when I had a call and had to get to church asap. I dressed up quickly and left the house. I got to the bus stop patiently waiting to cross the road to the other side and then, boom my story began. 

I turned and there she was. A lady who had gotten down from one of the buses parked by the road. It was about 8:10 am and most people at the bus stop were on their way to church. Our unknown lady had the attention of almost everyone. The few passengers in the bus and passers-by were looking at her. Ask me why? ? why? 

She was hotly dressed, too hot for a Sunday morning (in my opinion). She was in a crop top and a miniskirt. The bright colour of her outfit, yellow, attracted more stares.

Most of the people with me at the bus stop who were also waiting to cross to the other side of the road were elderly women, plus some mothers with their younger ones, teenagers, and young ladies. With our unknown hotly dressed lady. We were all at the zebra crossing waiting for about 10 to 12 seconds. And oh mine, all I said in my mind was, “these elderly women and mothers will kill this girl in their minds”. I turned to look at their facial expressions to be sure if my thoughts were right. The way some of the women were looking at our lady if looks could kill they would have without a weapon.

Some of them were whispering and you could literally hear what others were saying. These are a few of the comments I overheard:

• “look at how you have dressed this early morning”…
• “Eiii coming from night business”…
• “Did she really look at herself before stepping out like this”…
• “So did her parents see her stepping out like this”…
• “Girls of today, coming from your boyfriend’s house dressed like this”…

So we finally crossed to the other side of the road. And our hotly dressed lady got more attention at that end too.

Well, I got into a taxi and left. In the taxi, I started thinking. All the people including me with our thoughts about the lady could actually be so wrong. What if this wasn’t the outfit she went out with?  Maybe something happened and she had to change into this? What if that was the only dress she had? What if, yeah, she went out to chill and that was it? What if she went to visit a sister or a girlfriend, and her dress got stained so she changed to this outfit, and not as people were thinking she was coming from a boyfriend’s house. 

I remembered back in university, most people always thought I was a busy person. And even now people still think that about me. It used to get me worked up but later I enjoyed that thought from people. Well, they think I’m busy so they won’t worry me with their stress ???. I always tell friends not to think for me, you might get it wrong. Just ask me and you will get the right answer. A friend once told me I come across as a busy person because I’m always doing something. And I asked her does she know how she comes across to me? I told her I read this somewhere “Don’t watch what the clock does, do what it does. Keep moving”. ? so that’s it.

When I first met my best friend I thought she was a quiet person. I named her my quiet friend. Till one day I saw her jumping and laughing out loud with some of her friends. Then I realized she wasn’t a quiet person as I thought.

Don’t just think for people, you might be so wrong. Get close to them, know them, then you will know who they really are. Just as you won’t be happy knowing the thought someone has about you is wrong, so you also don’t make assumptions about others. Have a free mind and be kind to others.

Written by NKD, July 2019

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